Welcome To My Boring Vanity Website!

Having a weblog can mean a lot of things:

1) I have little to no social life and turn to the Internet in the hope that some stranger will stumble upon something I wrote about how much I enjoy friends or laughing or jokes and leave a comment saying that he or she feels the same way. I will call this person my soulmate and attempt to marry him or her much to the dismay of my family and friends.

2) One time when I was ten years old, I went to the public swimming pool with my mother. On the high dive, I yelled, “hey mom! Look at me. Look at me! Look at me! Lookatmelookatmelookatme!” She didn’t look. I still haven’t gotten over it. Maybe writing on the Internet will quench my insatiable thirst for attention.

3) I’ve seen a few sites where uninformed assholes share half-baked opinions and have thought to myself, “Hey, I can do that!”

4) I am insecure and need strangers on the Internet to confirm my opinions on things. Not actually having opinions can make this difficult, but spending several hours a day researching which opinions I should have helps.

5) I have run out of ways to feed my massive ego.

6) I have a lot of time to kill and do said killing by pretending other people care about what I have to say. I like pretending.

7) I have a bizarre compulsion to remind people that I have no talent.

So, which of these applies to me? Pretty much all of them.

Still, if someone asks me why I decided to start a blog after leaving this webspace dormant for nearly two years, my official answer is that I just want a space and an excuse to write regularly. I get to do a little writing at work, which is awesome, but pretending I like Slipknot isn’t terribly fulfilling regardless of how much I love my job.

What is fulfilling? Exercising the tiny, tiny creative portion of my brain on a regular basis. Also fart jokes. Fart jokes are very fulfilling.

So, I guess this means I’m back. I’m sorry.

1 Comment »

Glad to see you are back!

Comment by Laundro
January 17, 2006 @ 9:38 am
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